The Big No
“Refrain, under all circumstances, from initiating or
engaging in any sexual conduct, sexual activities, or sexualizing
behavior involving a client, even if the client attempts to
sexualize the relationship.”
--NCBTMB Code of Ethics
“Not engage in any sexual activity with a client.”
--NCBTMB Standards of Practice V (e)
“in the event the client initiates sexual behavior,
clarify the purpose of the therapeutic session,
and, if such conduct does not cease, terminate or refuse the session”
--NCBTMB Standard of Practice VI b
This is one area where client consent is unavailing. If the client initiates sexual conversation, the therapist should take charge of the conversation and immediately change the subject. The therapist should not participate; should not open that door or permit that door to be opened. If the client continues with such conversation or behavior, the therapist should advise the massage will be terminated or simply terminate the massage and leave the room. The therapist is in charge of the massage always.
This example was given by a massage therapist, referred to here as Sue. Sue had an established client with whom her conversations, while never sexual, had become slightly flirtatious. One evening Sue came upon the client as he stood in the lobby speaking with another therapist. The other therapist had a strange look on her face. Sue soon realized the problem when she glanced down and noticed some exposure on the client’s part. Sue and the other therapist spent the next 2 hours hiding in the sauna. While this situation was caused by an extreme and unwarranted act on the part of the client, Sue feels that had she conducted herself professionally, the client may not have dared risk the misbehavior.
Male therapists treating female clients should exercise extreme caution and pay great attention to the client’s consent (chapter 10) to avoid any issues in this area.
There is a difference between being touched for professional massage and for arousal. Erotic massage may be an effective pastime for a couple in private but it is across the boundary for what is permissible in professional massage. Hair dressing is nonsexual; so is massage in a professional setting. Some clients may need to be educated to appreciate the distinction. At first hint the therapist should let the client know the therapist is a qualified professional and that is that. Gossiping with client about eroticized massage only casts doubt upon the industry and feeds rumors.
“Research and consumer surveys leave no doubt that massage is now thought of first and primarily as a legitimate, legal, and honorable profession,” writes Linda Diane Feldt, past president of the American Polarity Therapy Association. That reputation is burnished—or tarnished—by the actions of every practitioner. Lawyers did not become a joke because every lawyer was bad and rapacious but because a small percentage were dishonest or greedy. Every therapist represents not only that therapist’s practice but also the industry.